Hey. You know I had a crush on you, right? That's the past.
I wanted to tell you about my three-legged project. I am 1) running for Congress (yes again). 2) trying to woo Avril Lavigne (or a better girl (in her and my opinion)), and 3) REDACTED until you talk back to me.
I thought you could help me go viral. Well you could definitely. Would you mind? Pretty please without me on top?
-Alex
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